Graduation

Today my younger daughter graduates from high school.

We're having a brunch for her before the ceremony since only six tickets were given to each student. After the three of us that leaves three family members who will be able to attend - her grandmother, someone to look after grandmother and one more person.

It's an interesting place to be, watching the youngest step out into the world. On the one hand, I'm so relieved to be done with school (public school) and for her to begin being responsible for herself (as if she weren't already). On the other, it scares the hell out of me that the last 17 years have flown by so quickly. Will the next twenty do the same? I will be 79 in twenty years. Twenty short, fleeting years.
She will be thirty seven.

Over on Althouse they were talking about whether women are unhappier now than ever, in spite of having so many choices.

Maybe it's the choices that make some women unhappy.

I for one, since I don't have enough money to buy happiness, take pleasure in simple things.

For example, in preparation for my daughter's party this morning (in 5 hours), I cooked most of the day. Blintz casserole, key lime pie cupcakes, hash brown casserole.

Then I went out and washed the windows on the front of the house, downstairs, where folks will be sitting and looking outside. I managed to get DH off his butt and he helped scrub the mildew off the lower part of the siding. We get zero sun and mildew will take over if you're not diligent.

Then I scrubbed the garage door, also a little mildewy.

Then I planted four or five hostas that a friend gave me.

Finally, we spread mulch over the front yard where we tried in vain to get grass to grow for many years, finally threw up our hands, admitted defeat and went with mulch. It takes 30 bags to cover that little patch of ground. I should post some pictures.

I was very happy. The old house looked pretty good, the yard looked nice, the food smells great. Friends and family are coming to share the day with us.

I was pretty happy.

My mother believed in making the best of what you had and she didn't have much. She lived in an old house that was built by her father some time in the 1930's. It's where she grew up, where she and her other ten siblings lived.

It wasn't particularly well built so over the years it started looking bad and required a lot of propping up. But she scrubbed and painted and did her best, and was happy that she had a place to live and wasn't in debt and wasn't like a lot of older folks who had to pay rent. In that way she was not unhappy, she didn't envy others or want for things she couldn't afford.

Some of my family members coming today live in a $2 million dollar house. Notice I don't call it a home. I am not envious but I do wonder what it's like to have that kind of money. I wouldn't buy a $2 million home with it because living in that kind of neighborhood doesn't appeal to me. I would, however, buy a huge parcel of land with a small house so that I could have as many animals as I could afford.

Sometimes I'm intimidated by their success and feel that I squandered too many opportunities but then, I do not have the personality or temperament to deal with what you must deal with to become wealthy.

I do admire their perseverance and vision and hard work and stick-to-itiveness.

But my family member is not happy. She is really depressed and takes medication for it. I have another friend, same story. They've never had money problems, she lives in a modest, mere $450,000 home (or it was, a few years ago), good kids, good husband. She's depressed, sees a shrink, takes medicine.

Me, I just go out and wash windows and dig in the yard.